I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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