I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
