did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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