is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
