well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
