At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
can u get pink eye on your cock?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Panties = found
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
