nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
