i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize