super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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