I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
