Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
