Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I think I am morally bankrupt
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize