The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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