I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize