i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Enjoy the penises
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
