I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize