oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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