Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize