Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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