My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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