he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize