i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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