I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
