For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
