i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
