Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
