But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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