You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
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