I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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