it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
