look no pants
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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