Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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