Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
