It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
