at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
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I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
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And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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