Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize