Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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