talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
