Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
