Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
handjob tips. give me some.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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