i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
