this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
