Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just high enough for therapy.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
