well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize