we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
