WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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