He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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