It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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