i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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