There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
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HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
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don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
My vagina just clenched in fear
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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